"Don't be Afraid" My Ass

 

Contrary to popular belief now, since I am a whole heathen and sinner, I grew up in a strict religious household. My parents were so strict that if it didn't have anything to do with school, church, or Eastern Stars/Masons, I was not allowed to do it.

Like I said, I grew up in the church. My father was a deacon. Actually, he basically ran the church. He was the treasurer and managed the church's money. I know this because, as a kid, I used to input the tithe and offering data into his computer for him. That's actually how my computer skills started developing. I was nine years old. 😂 When my father got a computer, he bought me one too. I was one of the only kids in school who not only had a computer in their house, but had one in their room. Of course, what was I doing with this fancy computer? Playing games and creating banners for my wall. 😂 I guess that's also how my graphic design career started.

It's funny when I think about it now. Technology and art, both starting with my dad putting a computer in my hands.

But growing up in the church, you get to know Bible stories very well. I never understood why, anytime I would read about angels appearing to people, the first thing they would say was, "Don't be afraid." It wasn't until my own encounter with one in a salt mine turned cathedral in the middle of Colombia that I finally understood why!

So usually when I visit a different country, I like to pay for an adventure to explore. In Panama, I visited a waterfall and an Indigenous land and people. For Colombia, I went to Guatavita City and Lagoon. I learned about the Indigenous people and their rituals, especially how they used salt as currency. And fun fact, mangoes are good for your heart, which is why they are shaped like a human heart. In Colombia, the doctors don't ask, "How is your heart?" They ask, "How is your mango?" So from here on out, I decided to say something has my 🥭 instead of something has my heart ❤️.

Anyway, part of the adventure, we also went to the Salt Cathedral. Well, first we went to an authentic Colombian restaurant, and then we went to the Salt Cathedral. It's so amazing to me that in one day I went 10,000 feet above sea level to hundreds of feet below the earth's surface. Talk about highs and lows. Lol. But this Salt Cathedral was made in a salt mine in Zipaquirá. They carved 22 deep holes to illustrate the journey of Jesus Christ's crucifixion. I'm not gonna lie, it felt uneasy the whole time. I couldn't even get close to some of the displays because looking into the dark depths of some of these caves was scary as hell. I have seen As Above, So Below, and I am good. So we are already starting off unsettled.

So I make my way through all these displays, which were mostly just crosses ✝️ placed strategically. Then you get to the point where it ends, and you go further down to all the shops and restaurants they have. There are several ways to get to this part. One way, you turn left, go down this maze of stairs, and pass a lit-up church, and you're near the shops. So I walk around and smell this amazing smell and follow it, like a cartoon character being carried off by the smell of something good to eat. And I find my way to this spa. This delighted my little esthetician mango. 😂 I bought what the smell was, an oil-based room spray and some rose detox salt scrub, because what's a spa in a salt mine supposed to sell? A good salt scrub that's what.

So happy with my purchase, I am ready to get the hell out this mine. So I go back to that maze of stairs and travel back up from whence I came. But this time, something was different. As I get to the top of these stairs and turn the corner, something said, "Look up."

Why the fuck did I do that?

My whimsical ass looks up to see a 10-foot angel ominously looking down at me from a 10-foot platform. Bruh, I ain't never been that scared in my life. You should have seen me scrambling to get the hell away from this giant-ass angel. Now, it wasn't easy trying to fast-walk over uneven, slippery-ass salt. It's like cobblestone but made of salt and waxed to the Gods, or maybe the angels, who knows. But I was not about to find out.

Never again.

I definitely know why they say, "Don't be afraid." But at least they warned the people in the Bible. No, I got, "Look up!"

Kiss my ass!!!